Thursday, April 2, 2015

Sentence Sneak Peek - Dr. Critchlore's School for Minions

The first sentence from each chapter of Dr. Critchlore's School for Minions, it's a mini summary of what you can expect to read.

* Read via NetGalley for review

Give a man a fish, and he eats for a day.

Slow and steady wins the race, if you have minions to sabotage your opponent.

Sometimes, monsters are hard to see.

I love my Critchlore Flying Monkeys!

They call him the Minion Whisperer.

Be prepared, with explosives.

One termite can be squashed, but thousands of termites can raze a toolshed, or maybe a small cottage!

Critchlore minions: They’re not just for evil overlords anymore.

You’ve Just Been Raised from the Dead.

An overlord without a minion is like a toothless shark.

To lead uninstructed minions into battle is to throw them away.

With great power comes the responsibility to have great minions.

Just so you cannot teach a crab to walk straight, you cannot teach a Critchlore minion to be unfaithful.

Discipline, Duty, Determination, and On-Time Delivery.

Take six hairs of werewolf, extract of valerian root, tooth of sloth.

Have a problem with encroaching neighbors?

To Live Is to Conquer.

Never walk underneath a flying dragon without an umbrella.

The difference between the impossible and the possible is a team of minions.

Opinions are unique, so don’t have them.

One evil overlord shall be my master, until such time as I am laid off or downsized to a foreign evil overlord.

An investment in minions is an investment in security.

In the future, any student caught riding a dragon without a helmet will get detention.

Like a good friend, a minion is there when you need him.

People who use explosives often blow themselves up.

Minions work best when they work together.

I curse thee!

Crichlore minions: For when you get the urge to conquer large parts of the world!

True genius lies in identifying a minion’s strength and enhancing it for maximum effect.

A friend in need needs minions.

An untrained minion is as useful as a pet rock.

In times of peace, minions make good sandwiches.

One should never, ever eat a minion.

Don’t count your minions before they’re trained.

Minions are power.

A man is known by the minions he keeps.

Fortune favors those with minions.

Great things are accomplished when minions work together toward a common goal.

Without question, the most important beings on the planet are the dryads, without whom we would all perish, for without trees we would have no oxygen.

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